Dear uncle Lubcho I antie Irji,
My name is Martin and I was born 3.5 kg on 21 January 2005 just after lunch time (which was convenient so we could all eat lunch, which is important if you know my mum and dad, especially as we had not eaten since the night before). Mum says my delivery was not that bad and she would do it again any day although apparently she lost her voice from shouting while I was being born and said some bad words to the people at the hospital. Which was naughty. But she feels a bit proud as she did not have any pain relief other than 'gas and air' and she says they should call that just 'thin air' and stop misselling to the general public as it does f**k all.
I really want to meet you but you know how in Bulgaria you are not shown to adults for 40 days because adults breathe germs and stuff so we will have to be patient. My 40 days are up on 1 March which is kind of cool because it coincides with Baba Marta which happens to be my ‘name day’ and also the first day we will be moving into our new house. So I am probably going to be having my 'Pogacha' party then but I will let you know details nearer the time. But may be if you have got a cold or anything you could come and see me another time as I would not have had my immunisation yet. I am available most days since I have very little to do at the moment but sleep, eat, poo and that's about it most of the time. Oh, and I also like to be awake between the hours of midnight and 6 am every night. Mum says to Dad that may be we should consider relocating to the other hemisphere to accommodate my sleeping patterns and that Australia sounds like a nice place and that hopefully our friends will be able to come and visit occasionally. But I am not sure when we are going.
I am sending you a picture of me so that you can recognise me in the crowd at the party in case there are lots of people. The predominant opinion is that I look like mum but she disagrees. She thinks I look like Dad and even more like some guy called Yoda but I don’t know who that is yet.
I am not sure if the Yoda guy is coming to the party or not but mum says THE FORCE will be with us and that we hope you would be too.
Kisses and cuddles,